Thursday, June 25, 2015


Her struggles broke my heart! Let's help her with our words of advise..

First advice from Tunde Oni- Forgive yourself as no condemnation will undo the abortion.

Good day ma,

I just stumbled on your blog and i would like to share my story (I would like to be anonymous) and also get some advice.

 I am married with a kid, my marriage will be two years in August. I had never had it good with my husband since we got married because he gets angry easily and like keeping malice, cooking for himself and calling me names anytime we have a misunderstanding. My first pregnancy was quite difficult because i was not working at that time and my husband always take the frustration on me because he does not like his job and his salary is quite small.  So I made up my mind that I will get a job before having my second baby.

 I got a job when my baby was five months old. He has changed since i got the job.We had an unprotected sex and he told me to take care of myself and he won't be involved if i get pregnant because his contract is ending soon with his company which might leave him jobless so we have my job to rely on but i react badly to morning after pill so i took salt and water solution because it has been helpful. i missed my period in May but i did not take it serious when i did not see it after two weeks, i did a pregnancy test and it came out positive. My baby was just 10 months old. My husband did not want to hear that and he out rightly suggested an abortion, i cried bitterly that night because i did not do an abortion as a single lady but he begged me and promised to always be there for me and not forget my sacrifice.

I did the abortion the next day. it was the most painful and difficult decision i had ever made. my husband just asked how i was feeling and did not say anything. The next day, my husband started calling me names and said he will never forgive me for the abortion i did and that am now worthless in his sight since I made him sin against God. Those words were too much for me to swallow and I told him to leave me alone and handle my regrets and pains. Since then, he does not talk to me or eat my food, he cooks for himself and he has stopped giving my baby and I upkeep money. I am tired of the marriage and I would like to quit. 

The guilt from the abortion is killing me and I cant even forgive myself after what my husband said to me. Please I need help!


  1. It's a pity u r going thru all this. The first thing to do is to forgive ursef for d abortion.if u r Catholic I suggest u go for a confession and absolution. Pls pray n commit ur marriage problems to God. I hope ur husband doesn't beat u as well? Commit it all to God n everything ll be fine.more power to ur elbow

  2. My dear, I know how it feels,pls you need to ask God to forgive you and then forgive yourself, only then can you experience true peace but you also need to talk to someone ur husband respects like a mentor,maybe ur Pastor or a matured older friend or a counsellor because this may be the beginning of worse things to come if not acted on as soon as possible. You need to be fine for yourself and your child pls. God keep you safe

  3. forgive yourself and move on with your live. You have a job and thank God only one baby. Practical Christianity teaches me that you should move on with your life before he kills you like the Arowolo case in Lagos

  4. My dear you do not need to feel bad or sorry anymore.... You have to forgive yourself because the action you took was based on your husband's admonition and you answer to your husband as the head of the family... Those kind of menace dangerous you really need to be careful next time...he is a manipulator...and he is in denial. God has seen your heart and it doesnt matter what other people think about you... Pick up from where you left off thank God you are working... Care for yourself and your child... You should talk to his parent or guardians... And seek God's face, you can separate for a while to clear your mind and find answers.... Let divorce be the last resort. Cheers!