Friday, June 19, 2015

IMPOSSIBLE TO LOVE 10

I need a plan. I definitely need one. The thing is when I told King to come home, I did it merely on instinct. The need to further protect what I had. The more I thought about it though, I realized I never really had it anyway. The marriage was doomed from the start and I did not really understand my need to save it. Okay now that I'm thinking about it, maybe getting a divorce is not so bad after all. People will gossip for a while and eventually move on to other juicy stories. The last time I felt loved by my so called husband was during our honeymoon. I have been lied to, deceived, raped, wrongly accused and insulted. I really do not see any dramatic change that will suddenly make King and I live happily ever after. I have lived in this illusion long enough and I might as well cut off this so called marriage tie before it drags on longer than this. That was exactly my state of mind when King walked in that Wednesday afternoon.
I was just resting on the sofa watching my favorite television series. I was actually in an excited mood, laughing heartily while watching. I heard the knock on the door and I was still laughing when I opened the door,

"King!'' I exclaimed, quite surprised actually even though I knew he was coming. I just stood there mouth agape.

''Are you going to allow me into the house?'' 

Not realizing I was blocking the entrance, I quickly stepped aside as he walked in and I shut the door. He sauntered into the house looking round like the house was now beneath him. I couldn't ignore the arrogant vibes and I really did not see the possibility of me standing this whole attitude for the next four days but for now, I could bottle all my feelings. I walked up to him and gave him the hug of a lifetime.

''I missed you baby'', I said. I was quite shocked when he hugged me back. It was like all our problems had melted away and I actually felt mushy all over.He pulled me tighter when I tried to pull away but few seconds later, he finally let me go. “Is there food to eat in this house?’’ “Yes I actually made some soup so let me just make you something to eat with it.” I quickly walked into the kitchen; I needed to gather my thoughts on what next to do so I needed the distance. About an hour later when King was getting up from the dining table, my parents arrived. I was definitely bewildered that both of them will visit me at this time of the day. There was no doubt in my mind that my mum had told dad all about my problems. After declining food, explaining that they just had lunch, dad asked us to sit down that he wanted to discuss with us. I was quite worried that King will think I planned this whole meeting. My worries were put at bay however when my dad mentioned that King had initiated the meeting. My dad started,

“Son, to be candid, I was quite surprised that you called us to your house. I expected you to have the decency to come to my home if you wanted to talk to me. I obliged only because I have recently been made aware of the sensitivity of your marriage and I don’t want to fuel things.’’ “I apologize for not coming sir, sincerely, I did not think it through’’, he said.
 “Kingsley, you don’t seem to be thinking a lot of things through. The guts you have to treat my daughter like dirt after lying to us and deceiving us into giving you her hand?’’ My mum rested her hand on his laps trying to calm him down, he was visibly angry. “Esther, I can’t believe you will hide such a thing from us. You simply amaze me’’. I just kept silent not really knowing what to say. I wasn’t too happy with the direction the discussion was heading. When I heard King speak, I looked up, “With all due respect sir, I will not sit here and be insulted. I am not going to comment on whatever I told your daughter to get her to marry me. That is between two of us. I called you to tell you I am divorcing your daughter and I will also like to return whatever dowry I paid to you.” I was so shocked, my mouth went wide open. Next minute I saw my dad charging at him and giving him punches. He was very angry. I could not even say a word. I was just watching the scene unfold as King was trying to fend off my dad with his hands. I could not handle it anymore. Stop! I screamed at the top of my voice. All three sets of eyes looked at me like I was crazy. “Dad, I want you and mum to leave please. I can handle it from here.” My dad looked like he was set to argue but my mum spoke to him silently and I guessed whatever she told him was enough to change his mind because they immediately left.

I looked up at King sitting silently on the sofa after they left and I had to ask him some questions. In spite of all his lies, there was a sweet part to the man I married and that part was buried beneath all the bitterness.

"I want to ask you some questions and I really need you to answer me sincerely. Is there someone else King?''

"No, there is nobody else."

"Do you believe that I really had a miscarriage and I never aborted our children?''

"Yes I do, I spoke to our doctor and he told me all about it."

"Why are you so bitter? Do you think I deserve all these?''

He was silent for a long time and  I did not think he was going to answer me. Finally he said,

"I don't know."

I had no other questions to ask. For some unimaginable reason, I held no more grudge or bitterness in my heart for my husband. I still loved him and the distance had made it easy for me to forgive all he did. I could not force him to stay married though. So I thanked him and went into my room to lie down. I ended up taking a nap for about two hours. 

By the time I came out of my room, I knew my husband was gone. I just felt that emptiness. I knew I was alone in the house. I checked his room and all his cloths were gone. There was nothing left of him. I found a note on the table,

"Sorry I could not wait till Sunday. I think it is better this way."

I sat down on his bed and cried for all I had lost.

11 comments:

  1. OMG!! My heart is really heavy. They should forgive each other and make up already. I can feel the love and fire from within burning and hurting them. Can I wait for friday?

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    1. Please wait, Friday is almost here

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  2. This thing called love sha.... sigh!

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  3. hmmm. heavy heart. waiting....

    pamscrib.blogspot.com

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  4. patiently waiting for friday..............................

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  5. Marriage truly is not for the weak, this is too much hurt while deep down they still feel something for each other

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  6. Tunde it's friday.TGIF.oya give me my weekly dose. Impatiently waiting.hehehehe

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  7. As sad as this is, its really an eye opener but she gt patience sha oo! Women are trying oo. Nice one once again.

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