Sunday, November 23, 2014


I met Toba just before I got admission into the University. We loved each other so much and we knew we wanted to get married someday. Fortunately, we got admission into the same University and we decided to keep our relationship pure and not have sex till our wedding night. We dated for three years but by the end of our 200 level, Toba’s parents decided to send him to London to continue his education. It was heartbreaking for both of us. Toba begged and begged but his parents were adamant and had already paid his school fees. The day before he was to leave, he came to see me in school and I told him to take my virginity. I was so in love, I told him it was his parting gift. Toba left and I didn’t even have a phone at the time. It was still expensive. Two months after he left, I realised I had missed my period twice. That was when it fully dawned on me that I was pregnant. I could not believe it. We did not take any precautions. I knew telling my parents was tantamount to death so I confided in my best friend, Oyin. We decided having an abortion was the solution and I did that with Oyin holding my hands throughout the process. I never heard from Toba again. He seemed to have vanished into thin air. I tried finding him on facebook and twitter but it was futile.  Initially, I was angry with him for so many years, then anger turned to disappointment and then I just felt neutral. Later I realised there was no point being angry with him, it was just bad timing for us. From that time, I never had sex with any man again. I just could not dare try it.

 Toba’s call took me by surprise. I had to ask again which Toba was speaking and he just laughed. He said he got back to Nigeria a year ago and had been trying to look for me. He finally just bumped into Oyin at Shoprite and got my number. He dialed my number immediately. He said he’ll call me again when he gets home. That call left me dumbfounded. I just did not know what to think. Why did he say he had been looking for me? How come he never forgot me? This was such a bad timing because until 10minutes ago, I was so sure I was in love with Abbey. God, I thought of Abbey, the man that has captivated my heart since the first time I saw him. I have never told him about Toba, despite the fact that I had told him about everything else. We had spoken about past relationships but Toba was the most important part and I left it out for reasons I could not decipher. I wondered why I was bothering myself anyway. Toba was probably looking for me like he was looking for other friends from his past. He was most likely married with kids and living a happy life and I would most likely marry Abbey, who was right now the man of my dreams. I was sure that would be the case so I put my mind to rest.

Later that day, Oyin called and gave me the gist of how she bumped into Toba and could not just believe her eyes. She gave me a full gist of how absolutely perfect he was looking. I was not surprised because Oyin usually had the tendency to exaggerate descriptions. I asked if she felt he was married or if he had a wedding band and she started teasing me to remember my love for Abbey before the appearance of Toba . She said she was sure he was not wearing a wedding ring and I just brushed it aside, after all there were many men these days that could not stand wearing a ring. Abbey came to visit me that evening and I started to contemplate whether to tell him about Toba or not. I knew in my mind not telling him was going to be a set up. I looked into Abbey’s eyes that night and knew I just could not let this guy go. I loved him sincerely. That night, we kissed and kissed and I told him I have finally decided to make our relationship formal.  Just as he was about to leave, he commented that he had never seen me so mushy and that he was sure there was something on my mind. I thought about it again and decided that if I did not give Abbey all now, I just might never do so. I sat him down and told him all about Toba, every single detail. I made sure I left nothing out. Then I finished by telling him about the call I got earlier.

He sat down quietly for a long time and asked why I never mentioned this and I told him I was not sure I loved him enough to bear my soul to him yet. He then said, will you still be very sure of your feelings for me if he comes back to you? I said yes. I felt like I had to hold on to Abbey for dear life. He would make a perfect husband and I really did love him. I told him Toba was my past and I wanted him and only him in my life henceforth. He told me to tell Toba that if he calls again and to keep him informed if anything happened. It was all sweet and mushy after then as Abbey kept telling me how much he loved me and did not want to loose me. Two weeks later, I broke my promise to Abbey...
© Tunde Oni 2016. All rights reserved.
To put plainly, this was written by Tunde Oni. Do not exclude my name when sharing, helping others shine never reduces your shine. God bless you as you honour this request.