Sunday, March 16, 2014


Just to be sure I had the right word, I went to Wikipedia to check the meaning of irrationality and here are a few definitions: "Irrational behaviors of individuals include taking offense or becoming angry about a situation that has not yet occurred, expressing emotions exaggeratedly (such as crying hysterically), maintaining unrealistic expectations, engaging in irresponsible conduct such as problem intoxication, disorganization, or extravagance, and falling victim to confidence tricks". Does this definition strike a cord? How many times do we make decisions or take actions in our home that we later regret but cannot reverse? How many times do we act out of anger only to realize we took the wrong step? How many times do we think we know the whole story and the true situation only to be slapped in the face by the truth and realize, it was totally different from what we assumed. How many marriages will still be standing if one person did not make an irrational decision?

For some reason I feel so strongly about today's post. This could be because I have made too many bad choices in the heat of the moment before I learnt my lessons.We make too many irrational decisions and half the time we do not even know the whole story. Funny we actually believe ourselves to be 100% certain at those times. We have looked at the presented facts, we have justified our decisions in a split second and we make one big decision all within 30 minutes and as a result, we make mistakes that we spend 10 years wishing we never did. How many people have walked out of their marriages in the heat of the moment and never got to reverse that decision even though they desperately wanted to.

Such situations could come up in a number of ways. Too many times we make half baked decisions as a result of jumping to irrational conclusions. Examples could be: You asked your partner for some money and he/she says they do not have any yet you find out after that they have, you then decide to strike back in a big way without actually knowing the reason your partner said no in the first place. What if the money belongs to someone else? What if the money was meant for a surprise gift for you? Another example is where your partner begins to come back late from work  and keeps telling you it is due to a heavy work load or more traffic than anticipated and you decide there and then he/she must be having an affair. What if you're wrong?
There are so many situations that begs for deeper thinking and much patience. I am not ignorant of the fact that many times your conclusions might be right but we cannot ignore the 40% of the time when your conclusions were totally off track and your already made negative decisions that cannot be reversed.

What would it have cost you to sit on that situation for one more day and see if you still feel the same way? A little more thought would often times salvage a bad situation. Wise decisions are never made at times of deep hurt and anger. If we reflect more, we would re-think a lot of things. Before you make that decision that would affect your marriage and your children, sleep on it for one more day.

Let us live, love and learn for the journey is still far and it is not for the fainthearted...

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